Kopi Luwak, which is a coffee made from “the beans of coffee berries once they have been eaten and egested by the Asian palm civet," a.k.a. coffee made out of beans that a cat pooped out. The Kopi Luwak coffee industry is rife with fakes and abusers, so I did my best and found a farm that appeared to be on the up-and-up and ordered from them - for a whopping $45 for 4 ounces of coffee! Luckily, I found three other suckers willing to go in on it with me.
UPDATE: Even for my precious mouth, it was on the thin side, and I had to be very generous with the cream and sugar. It was definitely smooth, but there was nothing else to it.
For future reference if I ever come into money: you can buy Black Ivory Coffee, which are beans collected from elephant feces, for a "mere" $66 for ~1.25 ounces.
